Saturday, August 1, 2009


As you all sit around enjoying your Vanilla Iced Creams in this sweltering summer heat, consider this Fact!

The Vanilla orchid was original discovered in Mexico by Mexicans, but the spice was not widely used by the rest of the world. In the early 1800s the French tried to cultivate it in France, but failed (cultivation FAIL) because French bees were too snobby to polinate it.

What happened next was that a 12-year-old boy named Edmond Albius discovered how to hand-polinate the orchid. (No that is not a euphemism for masturbation, although maybe it should be.) His discovery allowed vanilla to be mass-produced all over the world.

The thing about Edmond Albius is that not only did he revolutionize spice production at the age of 12, HE WAS A SLAVE. He made his amazing polination discovery WHILE PICKING A BALE OF COTTON.

So next time you sit down to enjoy a delicious Waffle Cone or Iced Vanilla Latte, by all means enjoy it, just remember that hundreds of thousands of African Americans suffered and died so that you could have it. That's all I ask.

Also, isn't it sweet irony that VANILLA was invented by THIS cool chocolate cat?

Edmond Albius

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